when my heART speaks…

Can I live off on ART alone?

I was asked this question by my boss yesterday, when we discussed a bit about my future.

Can I?

Truthfully, I got a bit scared. I have always lived on a parallel universe, balancing two things at the same time. I must say for many many years I’ve been doing this, I have survived.

I had a conversation with myself last night, as I always do when I need answers, I asked for a sign… The last time I did this was when I thought of giving up some of my work (earn less) and focus on my art (experience more). I was talking aloud, having a conversation with the universe when I asked for a sign. I got it in the form of an article from the newspaper written by the late Santi Bose. Then something else happened, this may sound bizarre, but suddenly I heard an otherworldly sound filling up the room, coming through the walls like dolby surround. It was not like anything I have ever heard, I call it now “angel music.” Then I just started crying, there was this overwhelming feeling inside of me, I felt joyful and at peace. This is when I knew the answer.

The next day, I resigned from the other programs I was handling and retained only one. I said I needed more time to do my art and my personal projects. I was poorer financially, but oh so richer spiritually.

*** FAST FORWARD

For years, I am doing something that has never been done before. I was able to establish a new role in the company and now that my contract is almost done, I am being judged if they still need my services.

So comes the question, CAN I LIVE OFF MY ART?

The answer didn’t come as dramatic as before but yes they came. I asked again for a sign and the signs came one by one, always about the same thing, consistently. I’m still scared but will see how it will go. Like what I’ve posted on my FB status a few days ago – ever since I was a little girl, I’ve only done things that makes me happy up until now. And like the line on my IG account – I’m consumed by F.A.T (Food. Art. Travel). These are what consumes me and I consume it all hungrily…

Inside me, I know what my heart sings, I just hope it doesn’t go out of tune.

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